Usually, the expression "a change of heart" means that someone has changed their mind. In my case it really is about my heart and how open it is to all people. This Fall is proving to be a very difficult time for me. I am in, what we call in the Christian world a "time of pruning". There is a beautiful story found in the Gospel of John, chapter 15 where Jesus tells his disciples that He is the "True Vine". The point Jesus is trying to make, is that when you have a rose bush or grape vine it needs to be pruned so healthy buds can form and blossom and that is what is happening to me. However, pruning hurts, it is a cutting away of bad leaves and ill branches, but as the bad is cut away there is room for more beautiful healthy fruit, it is a very good agricultural practise. This is the "season" I am in right now. God has been pruning me in deep ways. If you have experienced this type of pruning you know how long it can last and how painful it can be. What I have also learned from the past is to be very quiet during these times, to seek one or two very wise mentors to discuss the process with and to openly cry with the Lord.
In time, I will be able to discuss more openly the "issue" God is causing me to reflect on right now and if I am to be really honest God is challenging me to see if there is a particular sin in my life that needs His cleansing. For now, I will wait as He prunes me, I will speak to those whom are wiser than I am and I will be comforted with the hope that in the future I will bear more fruit and I learn to serve in a more healthy way. A change of heart, literally means being open to God's love and love for others. My heart, I pray, is always open-it is changing to be bigger and bigger to fit more people in.
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